Have you ever had someone look at you with absolutely no judgment?
That moment, when someone actually sees you for you, all of you, and knows that nothing is, was, or ever will be wrong with you, changes everything.
Experiencing this can be one of the most caring, nurturing and even seductive experiences in the world.
There are even psychological studies that suggest it only takes four minutes of direct eye contact for strangers to fall in love.
Recently Amnesty International took this one step further. They tested the 4 min idea in a more fragile situation; the refugee crisis in Europe and the increasing xenophobia.
They asked a number of Europeans and refugees to stare into each other’s eyes for 4 minutes.
This is what happened:
See, we’ve been trained to start every new encounter by a series of judgment to determine where this person fits into our pre-defined version of reality. We’ve basically been programmed to separate.
What if that training is what is in the way for a different future of the world?
What if oneness is actually much easier than you’ve ever imagined?
What if just a few minutes of eye contact could create that space of no judgment when you can see who this person actually…be?
Would you be willing to try this out? Today?
Ask someone, maybe even someone you’re not having an easy time with, to share a gaze with you for four minutes.
No other instructions or distractions. Put a timer on, stay present and look into each other’s eyes.
Then see what changes for the both of you.